The AME church Women's Missionary Society had a Sister's Summit in February at Bethel AME, in San Diego. The Speaker was Pastor Joann Browning from Ebenezer AME in Fort Washington, Maryland. When she stepped to the podium to speak, she told the women of the need to let go of their baggage. (i.e., grown children still in the home, abusive husbands, etc.)Her speech referenced Erykah Badu's song "Bag Lady", and then she played the song in its entirety and was groovin' to it. (900 women in attendance) said the place was "On Fire!!!!"."Bag Lady, you gon' hurt your back, draggin' all them Bags like that...."Reverend Joann then preached her sermon from the song. Here's the gist of the sermon....By now, we've all heard Erykah Badu's "Bag Lady". This song is a prime example of the healing powers of music, lessons in lyrics, and a message in the music. It serves as a wake-up call to women everywhere. And none of us are exempt. From the very first verse to fade out, the words resonate."Bag Lady, you gon' hurt your back, draggin' all them Bags like that...."SermonHolding on to pain, hurt, anger, and disappointment manifests itself in our bodies. The end result runs the gamut from chronic illnesses to life threatening diseases. Sooner or later, our baggage causes our bodies to give out."Bag Lady, you gon' miss your bus. You can't hurry up "cause you've got too much stuff..."When we spend our time focusing on negative people and negative experiences, we end up missing opportunities and blocking our blessings. We can't see the future because we're too busy living in the past. Meanwhile our perpetrators go on living their lives; oblivious to the hurt they've caused.So why are we really hurting? "When they see you comin', {they just} Take off runnin...."How many relationships have come together on crutches? Most women know they have no business getting involved when there are unresolved issues within. Still, due to fear of being alone, or of 'missing out' on a good man, we cover our wounds with tight hairdos, beautiful clothes, and a fake smile. For going ahead into an alliance with someone who has no idea we're still hurting over what that so-and-so did to us in 1995, or over the father that never came home.As time passes, the wounds get harder and harder to hide. When they're finally exposed, he's history! In the grand scheme of things, the only thing that is stopping us.... is...US!True, we have no control over what others do or say to us, but we can control our reactions. And as for the baggage, it's nothing to be ashamed of. We all have issues. The shame is not in having baggage, it's KEEPING it.So to all my Bag Ladies, search yourself. Be honest. Ask yourself what's in your bag, then do whatever you gotta do.PRAY!CRY!SCREAM!GO TO CHURCH!GO TO THERAPY!Do whatever it takes!Just let it go! Let It go! Let it go! Stay strong.... Rock on! I am your Salvation; trust in Me and do not be afraid. I am your Strength and your Song. [Isaiah 12:2]If we recognize that GOD is in all of us, then we can start to treat ourselves and our brothers and sisters with respect.We are quick to spot the devil in us, why not the DIVINE?

the young man who recently moved to texas is someone who means alot to me. he was the first person to show me that there is a such thing as pure unconditional love, and he has made every possible effort to show me how much he cares. he's been one of my biggest supporters and i will love him forever.

for the past 9 years we've been close friends. there were rare moments when i wondered what could have been, but i think things worked out for the best. what we had was special, and those who knew us back then can verify just how special it was.

i met him when i was 15. we've both grown up and have experienced life on two different stages. we would never be the way we were back then, and i think it is best that the memories of how special we were remain preserved. i wouldn't dare ruin the memory.

we keep looking for that perfect person...that perfect relationship. there's no such thing. it will never be, so stop looking. how can you expect to have perfection when you aren't even close?

remember when you were younger?
if you liked someone, all you had to do was tell your friend. then your friend would tell his friend, and then his friend would tell him. or you'd write the infamous "I like you. Do you like me? Check Yes or No" letter? it was just that simple. true, the relationship only lasted for a few weeks (sometimes days), but looking at your love life now... weren't those days the best?!
at some point we forgot how simple relationships could be. we bring so much drama and extra baggage into relationships that its almost impossible to seriously dedicate yourself.

that's one of the main reasons why so many people don't invest too much time in relationships.

mistakes will be made. stop making the same mistakes over and over again. learn from them. if you don't have the best luck with relationships, re-evaluate. ask what went wrong and find out how can you prevent it from happening again. stop focusing on the other person's mistakes. if every single relationship you've had turned out wrong, it may not be the other person. it could very well be you. remember, it takes two. so what mistakes did you make?

let go of the past. TRUST ME ... it's not worth it!!

harboring all those negative situations is not healthy for you or your future relationships. just because a few people treated you wrong, it doesn't mean that every person you meet will. don't punish the next one for the last one's mistakes.

all men don't cheat and many women do. people use the excuse "I'm in an open relationship." what the hell is that and what purpose does it serve?! i mean is it really okay? what's the purpose of being in a relationship if you're going to be

f%*king other people?

learn how to walk away. it's possible to honestly care about someone, and not be with them. if you're not in a position to give them what they want and/or need, walk away. if you really love them, you'd let them go. give them the chance to be with someone who has the ability to offer them what you can't, but if you choose to stay, do right by them. in the end, it'll be worth it.

Females are complicated...sometimes too complicated. They overanalyze, overrationalize and in most cases overreact. They expect to be understood but rarely take the time to understand. They are offended when confronted with their own imperfections.
Some females have a sick infatuation with drama. Life can never be easy for them. These females normally create drama in order to fill a void or divert attention from their own issues.
Some females are too satisfied...too content with making the same mistakes. They underestimate their worth and overestimate their partner's worth. They are so settled that can't (or refuse to) see the real behind the fake.
There are also those females who cannot appreciate the benefits of being single. In desperation, they ignore their morals and values for the sake of having a man. They always have one but at a high price.

i believe that people should be allowed to live their lives in a manner that's pleasing to them. an ex-coworker and i discussed the issue of homosexuality, and he introduced an interesting point: is homosexuality a learned behavior, a choice, or are people born gay?
i believe in pre-determined destiny, and i also believe in free will. i feel that God has preselected our life paths, but has left us to decide whether or not we want to follow. i don't necessary believe that all homosexuals are born gay, but i do believe that sexual preference can be a direct result of learned behavior. now that doesn't mean that if a child is raised within a homosexual environment, that he/she will eventually turn to homosexuality; it depends solely on the individual. i've also heard some comment on changing their preferences as a result of being treated poorly by the opposite sex. What Do You Think?

*my opinion is my opinion*